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Monday, February 5th, 2007
12:41 pm - This is no advert. It's an opinion.

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Monday, June 19th, 2006
8:51 pm - World's Greatest Band announce new album
Today, Iron Maiden have announced that their 14th studio album, entitled "A Matter of Life and Death" will be released in early september.

The tracklisting is:

1. Different Worlds (Smith/Harris) 4.17
2. These Colours Don't Run (Smith/Harris/Dickinson) 6.52
3. Brighter Than a Thousand Suns (Smith/Harris/Dickinson) 8.44
4. The Pilgrim (Gers/Harris) 5.07
5. The Longest Day (Smith/Harris/Dickinson) 7.48
6. Out Of the Shadows (Dickinson/Harris) 5.36
7. The Reincarnation of Benjamin Breeg (Murray/Harris) 7.21
8. For The Greater Good of God (Harris) 9.24
9. Lord Of Light (Smith/Harris/Dickinson) 7.23
10. The Legacy (Gers/Harris) 9.20

Some dodgy titles in there but along with the length of the tracks, it tends to suggest that the rumours of a concept album are true.

I shall now be counting down the days until September. I've never been let down with a Maiden release and I can't see this being an exception. I'll also look forward to seeing the new tracks played live when I go to see them in December! :D

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Friday, June 16th, 2006
2:02 pm

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Thursday, June 15th, 2006
4:02 pm - Woohoo
Apparantley a 7 year old boy collapsed at school after taking Methadone. WOOHOO! Get them started early. Heroin vendys in primary schools from now on.

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Tuesday, June 13th, 2006
9:20 pm - Becaaaaaaaaaaause. I like lists. Fuck you.
100 things about me....

1. Full Name: Mark-James Lyell
2. Nicknames: Boyo, MJ.
3. Birthday: May 9th
4. Place of Birth: Dundee, Scotland
5. Zodiac Sign: Taurus
6. Male or female: Male
7. School year/grade: Fuck off.
8. School: *punch*
9. Occupation: About to enter the dizzy heights of software tutorials.
10. Residence: Lothian Road, Edinburgh
11. MSN Screen Name: Mark - This is Episode Six Six Six

__Your Appearance___

12. Hair Colour: Black. I occassionally add a red streak if the feeling takes me.
13. Hair Length: SHORT.
14. Eye colour: Grey
15. Weight: 16st 1
16. Height: 6'1"
17. Braces? Fuck off
18. Glasses? Even if I was short sighted it would be contacts all the way
19. Piercings: Closed up ear piercing.
20. Tattoos: I don't want to talk about it *cry*
21. Righty or Lefty: *punches you in the face with the RIGHT hand*

___Your 'Firsts'___

22. First best friend: My good buddy Gregory Phillip Jones.
23. First Award: Brighton B52s Junior American Football Club 1994 MVP award.
24. First Sport You Joined: As above.
25. First pet: Dustin the cat.
26. First Real Vacation: Log cabin ftw
27. First Concert: Rush at the SECC.
28. First Love: Ich plädiere das Fünftel auf diesem

___ Favourites___

29. Movie: Yeah, just look at my profile.
30. TV programme: " "
31. Colour: Sky Blue
32. Rapper: Kanyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
33. Band: Eeron Maydon
34. Song Right Now: None
35. Friend: Drew/Bailzo/Sarah
36. Sweet: Tunnocks Teacake - The Daddy of 'em all.
37. Sport to Play: Football/American Football/Cricket.
38. Restaurant: Jimmy Chungs/
39. Favourite brand: Fuck you.
40. Store: I refuse to answer questions which use America's twisted take on the Queen's English. It's a SHOP you raisin-diving, baby touchers. Not a store.
41. School Subject: English.
42. Animal: Human being.
43. Book: The spotting of Trains
44. Magazine: Kerrang - fuck you.
45. Shoes: Just go away. Anyone who has favourite shoes deserves death.


46. Feeling: Annoyed and nationalistic.
47. Single or Taken? Fucking single.
48. Have a crush: I want to fuck every good looking woman I see.
49. Eating: Nothing. I'm fucking starving.
50. Drinking: Lemonade.
51. Typing: Fuckpussy. That's what I'm typing.
52. Online? I honestly will kill you.
53. Listening To: The TV
54. Thinking About: Banning the Americans from using the English language until they can get it right. BASTARDS.
55. Wanting To: Have lots of sex.
56. Watching: That's it.
57. Wearing: Your Mum's lingerie.

___Your Future___

58. Want Kids? Yes. So I can eat them.
59. Want to be married? Just so I can run away at the alter.
60. Careers in Mind: Cigarette tester.
61. Where do you want to live: I want houses in New York, Helsinki, Edinburgh and Dundee.
62. Car: Ferrari F40.

__Which is Better In The Person You Like___

63. Hair colour: Dark brown and/or black
64. Hair length: Either
65. Eye colour: Do I give a fuck?
66. Measurments: Shorter than me, Not fat or skinny.
67. Cute or Sexy: Both, fucker.
68. Lips or Eyes: Both, fucker.
69. Hugs or Kisses: Both, fucker.
70. Short or Tall: Both, fucker.
71. Easygoing or serious: Both, fucker.
72. Romantic or Spontaneous: Spontaneous.
73. Fatty or Skinny: Neither.
74. Sensitive or Loud: Neither.
75. Hook-up or Relationship: SEX.
76. Sweet or Caring: Who gives a fuck?
77. Trouble Maker or Hesitant One: Neither.

___Have you ever______

78. Kissed a Stranger: No.
79. Had Alcohol: Oh no.
80. Smoked: Yes. Give me a cigarette now.
81. Ran Away From Home: No.
82. Broken a bone: No.
83. Got an X-ray: No.
84. Been Heartbroken: Aye.
85. Broken Someones Heart: No, but I want to.
86. Broke Up With Someone: Yes.
87. Cried When Someone Died: Yes
88. Cried At School: Like fuck I have. I only cried at the thought of having to go to the fucking place.

___Do You Believe In___

89. God: No no no no no no no. Fuck religion, fuck faith, fuck god. Religion is a fucking handicap.
90. Miracles: It's a miracle I haven't killed myself with these stupid questions
91. Love At first site? NO
93. Aliens: NO
94. Soul Mates: NO, nor do I believe in a "soul"
95. Heaven: NO
96. Hell: NO
97. Angels: NO
98. Kissing on The First Date: Yes, and fucking.
99. Horoscopes: NO.

___Answer Truthfully___

100. Is There Someone You Want But You Know You Can't Have?

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3:49 pm

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Friday, June 9th, 2006
10:53 pm - Oh fuck yes.
SECC. November 2nd, I'll be there. And here's why.


Just got myself tickets for the Unholy Alliance tour, featuring:

In Flames
Children of Bodom
Lamb of God
Thine Eyes Bleed

What an awesome lineup. Although I've not heard much of Lamb of God or Thine Eyes Bleed, I'm sure they'll be good live, as for Slayer, not one of my big favourites but a legendary band who will be awesome to see. As for In Flames, one of my favourite bands, saw them back in March and they were awesome. So of course the band I am looking forward to seeing the most is Children of Bodom! They've been one of my favourite bands for 5 years and they have rarely been in Scotland since then so I'll be lapping up this chance to see them.

Anyone who can go to a gig on this tour, get yourself a ticket. Very cheap and very awesome bands.

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Saturday, June 3rd, 2006
4:42 pm
Howdo mofos?

Yesterday we spent ages in the meadows playing rounders and generally getting tanned, then came home for a bit of an end of exams party. Lovely stuff. The place was packed.

Also I've updated my MySpace, admire, fuckers. Click here or die.

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1:51 pm

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Tuesday, May 30th, 2006
2:40 am - Is doing something with your life still cool?
I'm going to take a course with the Open University.

I bet I'm like one of 4 billion people who's ever said that but actually I'm quite looking forward to it.

The thought of going back to work or college is still a no go - too much anxiety involved for any of that malarky.

I really am blessed with a much better life than I deserve. I have a closer relationship with my sister than most (this is where I add the obligitory FUCK YOU to anyone who's thinking "ROFL incest!111") and a flatmate who has gone from a mate of my sister who I say hi to; to girlfriend of my sister who is one of my closest friends. I have friends in Dundee, one of which (Mr. Halliboy himself) is visiting at the moment. I'm waiting up on him right now actually - fucking teenagers and their rock concerts.

Yeah, it's all good. I suffer from depression and yet I do have a happy life. It's quite strange. I always have more friends than I think I do, and I can always talk to them about more than I think I can. Take Bailzo, complete fucking psycho but it's great to have male friends like him and Drew where I can be myself and not have to act like some sort of lad culture obsessed fanny.

Talking of lad culture obsessed fannys - the World Cup is coming up. Yes, I'm looking forward to it mightily but I swear to fucking shit, if I see one more advert which portrays male football fans as loutish, beer swilling arseholes, I will aquire a gun and SHOOT THE FUCKING TV. All adverts are wrong and disgusting. Fucking disgusting.

While I'm on this "friends" topic. I'd like to give a shout out to a few people on my friends list. Not all of whom I consider "friends" in person but I've never done this on LJ before so allow me to indulge, fucker.

Carrie - Fuck you for being such a good writer. But please, let it be known who you're refering to in your LJ rants.

Sarah - No I won't do the fucking dishes. Ok I will.

Drew - Hurry the fuck up so I can go to bed.

Kat - Now that we've taken a break and stopped all that love shit, Don't you think we're getting on better than ever?

Lisa - You intimidate the shit out of me (unintentionally) which I think is why we never got on as well as we should have.

Anna - Give me your bass. Now.

Bailzo - AARRJHGRHJRGRHGR HRI. You don't even have the internet.

Angela - I know you want me.

Aye. That's about it for one night.

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Friday, May 26th, 2006
12:25 am - Seriously.
Am I the world's most boring person? My journal is a pile of shit.

I'd like to say I got into a fight with my girlfriend then slit my wrists and was rushed in to have my stomach pumped only to flatline and die for 3 seconds before being revived by a hunky male doctor who then turned me gay and moved to Manchester with me to live happily ever after.

It ain't gonna happen.

By the way, I want weight loss tips people, I'm going on my annual 3 stone loss drive. If you remember that I exist please comment.

Edmonton are about to go into the Stanley Cup final. Fuck sake.

I love smoking but I don't want cancer - how can this be prevented without giving up?

My phone is a piece of shit.

I have no decent clothes.

I like my hair.

I'm getting better at Guitar Hero.

I'm going to see Maiden in December and Kev + Greg might be coming aswell.

Drew is coming over on Monday - catching up and h4x0r talk aplenty.

I am bored whenever Bailzo isn't here.

I heard Carrie and Sarah having sex last night.

I have to give Che back to my Mum before I become too attached and keep her until she dies and I am desraut.

I think I'm dyslexic. It's really scarey.

THF is 6.

Kat has become much nicer since she started going out with Greg.

Kat has become much funnier since she became good friends with Kev.

Kev talks to me more now - I reckon he thought I was a weirdo before.

Colin Mochrie is the world's funniest man.

You wait so long for sex and then you miss it when it's gone for short bursts.

I think I may be in love - fucking hell.

Bailzo says he's coming over at lunchtime tomorrow - aye.....

I couldn't give a flying fuck about the Dundee Stars.

I'm running out of random lines.

Most people on THF are right wing, nazi fuckfaces who think your job defines you and re-paving your driveway is something to plan for the upcoming year.

The death penalty is stupid.

Taxes should be higher.

The goverment is losing it.

Scotland is STILL better than England.

Dundee United....are shite.

The new AFI album is good.

The new Red Hot Chili Peppers album is good...WTF?

WTF is still a good expression.

Edinburgh is a good city.

I feel like having a wank but I won't.

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Friday, April 7th, 2006
3:50 am - That's right.
I'm updating.

I feel very good today, I've formatted my PC and it's going a lot better - the simple things.

Bailey was over tonight and it was a good night until I went in a bit of a huff over a sponge pudding and Carrie and Sarah being affectionate. Hey, I realise they're still in the mega lovey-dovey stage and much as everyone would like to think I'm NOT naive about relationships at all, I just don't like seeing my sister with her tongue continually down someone's throat all the time, I don't expect them never to touch, just not to look like they're starting some foreplay every 5 minutes.

Anyway, that's that rant over.

Since I last updated, I've seen the mighty IN FLAMES in concert and got tickets to MAAAAAAAAAAAIDEN in december. If you want my review of the In Flames gig (I know you don't) go to www.last.fm/user/IronMark

That's all. I'm smoking menthols :(

current mood: tired

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Thursday, January 26th, 2006
4:02 am - Ok maybe I'm pissed but
I fucking love my life in Edinburgh. I love Planet, Bloodbath, Velvet and Opium. I love the City Cafe and the Auld Hoose. Pool and darts, porno blooper videos. I love cigarettes and alcohol, I love being young and playing the guitar. I love being a magician with Bailey, I love the reaction on people's faces when I pull a trick. I love Mum, George and Graham more than anything. I love Carrie, Anna and Sarah so fucking much - I love the fact that Jill is on her way to a better life having dumped the ball and chain.

I love it all. You guys have no idea just how much you've done for me and my fucked up life these last few months. I can never thank you enough.

current mood: drunk

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Monday, January 2nd, 2006
12:54 pm - Everything is pish
Happy new year yer arse, I pray god it's our last...


Everyone is unhappy, well nearly everyone. There's a situation with Lisa and Iona which I have no right to comment on because I don't have the facts, so I won't. All I will say is that there are lots of tears and sadness, and that's all I know.

New Year involved a lesbian club called Velvet which was none too bad, 'twas a decent night with a few dramas and a couple of emotional moments for yours truly.

Jill and Sarah have been over for the last few days and it's been a good laugh. I still feel weird about considering Sarah one of "my" friends but I would like to think we are mates. Jill is cool aswell, even if she is a blaring right wing nazi (ok, I kid, I kid.)

On another note I have to pay £570 to Max by January the 20th. The man is a wanker. I'm not disputing that I owe him the rent and that I have to pay it, but the wee bastard is having a go at me for not 'informing' him of where I've been over the festive period. None of your business, arsewipe. Give me a lease, fucker.

So here begins another day with no money, no fags and everyone thinking I'm a freeloading bum. Refer to the opening line of this post while I sleep.

current mood: frustrated

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Wednesday, December 7th, 2005
2:03 pm
Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

This year I've been busy!

Last Friday I helped leedalee see the light (8 points). Last Saturday I helped steel_spine hide a body (-173 points). Last Tuesday I broke handsomite's X-Box (-12 points). In March I bought porn for fingerlicknpink (-10 points). In June I stole dehumanised's purse (-30 points).

Overall, I've been naughty (-217 points). For Christmas I deserve a moldy sandwich!


Write your letter to Santa! Enter your LJ username:

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Monday, December 5th, 2005
7:22 pm - Last.fm is the greatest site ever and more musings.
I'm trying to give up smoking but it's proving highly unsuccessful at the moment. Lollipops are staving the craving for a while. Oh Marlboro Menthol's - how I love thee.

The joiners are in right now doing their second installment of work on our kitchen. Our new kitchen is pure sex tbh, we have black worktops and a pointless counter of doom ala Neighbours.

In other news, Drew and I have today discovered a German electropop band called Melotron, they are simply awesome. Highlight tracks include Kindertraum, Es Wird Zeit and Folge Mir Ins Licht. Check them out, people. Now.

In other news, if I don't have sex soon, I may die. Time to get a crew through from Dundee and hit some straight places \o/

current mood: blank

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Thursday, November 24th, 2005
3:02 am - So ill. So very, very ill.
Wouldn't you think an eye infection is bad enough?


Why have I been hit with the flu of doom aswell then?

Right now I feel sick, sore, depressed and generally ugh. I've hardly been able to move today. DIdn't get out of bed 'til 4pm which, contrary to popular belief, is very rare for me. I just feel shit.

What have I been up to during these weeks of sparse updates?

Well there was a rather disturbing incident with Mum which I won't go into but it's thrown everyone into chaos, Mum and G seem to be getting better day by day which is good. During this time we've had Ché over here for a couple of weekends which has been nice, she seems to have a strange liking for me though, I call it "Greg Jones syndrome" she won't fucking stop following me around whenever I leave the room. Mum has pitched an idea of dog sharing whereby Ché comes through here every weekend so that she's not on her own when Mum goes out at the weekends. I'm a bit weary of that idea myself, since we're not even allowed pets in this flat.

In other news I recieved a lump sum of £450 from the social which is pretty much gone now, although I did make a few quality eBay purchases. A NYR home jersey with Lindross 88 on the back, a Quebec Nordiques Sakic 19 jersey with a C on the front, a Winipeg Jets jersey, an Icelandic flag, a Finish flag and a set of 15 sexy plectrums. In conjunction with these purchases, I made some changes to my room, now my big wall looks like the wall of a sports shop with all my hockey jerseys decoratively hanging two by two, my Icelandic flag draped nicely over my bed and my heavy metal posters on my bed wall. It looks a tad more organised and once the Finland flag is draped over the side of my bed, I will have an elite canopy.

I'm getting more money next Wednesday and this will be used to buy christmas presents for people. I, myself have been bought a 30gb iPod by my Grandad who is easily the most generous man on the face of this earth and for my other "big" present I'm hoping to buy David's guitar gear. An Ibanez RG470 and a 600 wat amp stack, amp head and effects pedal, it'll be pure guitar heaven. At £450 though, I'll probably have to pay him up.

Talking of David, with my sparse few friends in this city, I feel I've developed somewhat of a bond with him, we share musical tastes and a fondness for being straight men always surrounded by lesbians. He's also starting a magazine which I appear to be getting a column in which is nice - he's a good guy. Carrie has a habit of picking friends like that.

Ahhh Carrie. I'm worried about her, she's got too much on her plate and she's taking it in her stride without complaining (well apart from on her LJ but that doesn't count). It's a damn shame, she should be allowed to concentrate on uni without having to worry about getting some shitty go-nowhere job to live - she's better than that. But that's the way the world works. I suppose she's paying her dues now because in 10 years she'll be going all over the world while losers like the one who questioned her gender in the pub the other day will be lying in their beds watching daytime TV and trying desperately to get a wank out of their tiny penises. It annoys me that she lets it bother her instead of laughing it off but I suppose without being in the situation I can't comment. Anyway, when all is said and done, Carrie is pretty much the most amazing person I know and she'll have an amazing life whatever she does.

In some other random news, Curly, a casual friend from the hockey in Dundee has had his niece and brother die within two days of getting back from his wedding in South Africa. It's so fucking shit, I can't imagine how he must be feeling, it really puts in perspective the shite that I worry about every day when I hear about something like this, Curly is a good guy and doesn't deserve this kind of crap. It's just not fair.

Anyway, to end on a happy note, even though I'm a bit down just now I've *generally* been feeling pretty good lately and I hope it continues. Life isn't so bad, Edinburgh is great and I am socialising with people who I feel comfortable with for the first time in years, I have a fantastic room in a flat in a great location with intelligent and interesting flatmates and the NY Rangers are off to a 14-7-3 start and are 4 points clear at the top of the Atlantic. Life ain't so bad.

current mood: cheerful

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Monday, November 21st, 2005
6:55 am - I am perfect.
My life has been rated:
Click to find out your rating!
See what your rating is!
Created by bart666

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Monday, November 7th, 2005
2:35 pm - Lisa, I want a divorce.
So, the wonderful social have decided that I am not married to Lisa and can pay me benefit. Woo followed by Hoo :|

I HATE the general idea of getting money for nothing, but sadly I have no other choice, I didn't ask to have a mental illness and I need to live so bah.

On another note, a new mouse seems to have taken residence in our kitchen and I for one have decided to take out full scare war on it. I'm not cleaning that kitchen on my own though, as soon as someone is willing to half the job, we'll go in there and scrub it spotless and then leave traps, ultrasonic frequencies and other things to stop these vermin breathing.

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Sunday, October 30th, 2005
9:37 pm - Halloween is pish.

Fucking American Bollocks. The most annoying, irritating and juvenile 'celebration' by a mile. I emplore you people, do not buy into the crap. It's all shite, where is your British pride? Don't let us become a country of psuedo-Americans. BAAAAAARGEHRERGEHRGERE RRGHGR.

current mood: full

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